Doris’ Life Lessons

Well, I’m a fan of Harry Potter. Not an avid fan but I’ll make sure I catch the movie whenever it’s screened. Becos Harry Potter is soooo cute!!! =)

Anyway, I was watching the 2nd Part (Harry Potter & the Chamber of Secrets) again during CNY on Ch 5.

I remembered especially 2 scenes even when the show ends and decided to share with you.

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Scene #1:

Harry Potter went to Professor Dumbledore’s office and saw an old Phoenix who burnt herself to death and then got reborn from her ashes.

According to Professor Dumbledore, phoenixes can carry enormous weights, their tears have extraordinary healing powers, and their song is said to strike fear into the hearts of the impure and courage into those who are pure of heart. They will die in their self-made flames, then rise again out of their own ashes.

I remembered during a training session some years back, one of my mentors told me to be as courageous as a phoenix.

"Die at your lowest point, and be reborn yet again, this time stronger and more powerful."

Shouldn’t we all learn from our mistakes and setbacks? Though these can bring us down, they serve us well and make us stronger, better people.

Be like the PHOENIX

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Scene #2 (towards the end of the show where Harry Potter was having another conversation with Professor Dumbledore):

The House of Gryffindor values courage, chivalry and boldness.

The House of Slytherin (where Harry’s rival Draco Malfoy was) values ambition, cunning and resourcefulness.

The Sorting Hat had initially wanted to place Harry Potter into the House of Slytherin instead of the House of Gryffindor because Harry possesses all the qualities that a Slytherin has - Parseltongue, Resourcefulnes, Determination, a certain disregard for rules…

But why did the Sorting Hat finally place Harry Potter into the House of Gryffindor?

"Because I asked him to!" said Harry Potter.

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I have been spending the last few months thinking about my career after my PhD. I started to explore what I am good at - organisation, logistics, hands-on etc… Maybe I should be an event manager! Seems to suit me the best. But do I want to be one…?

Life is not about doing what you are best at. More importantly, life is about doing what you WANT!

Though choosing a career that you are good at doing is important, the ultimate question still lies in which direction you want to go towards. What do you want? We should never be directed totally by our qualities. Rather, we should be directed by our mind, soul and passion.

Being good at swimming doesn’t mean that you have to be a swimmer if you have no desire to be one.

Being bad at swimming doesn’t mean you cannot be one if you have the mind, soul and passion for it.

The Mind, Soul and Passion will over-ride the qualities and create miracles.

It’s because of this question on ‘What do I want?’ that leads me to do a PhD, to join a Toastmasters Club and to keep challenging myself in Chinese Calligraphy competitions some years back.

I had since forgotten that question but Harry Potter brought it back once again. I am now clearer.

Following my latest manuscript REJECTION last week (I have talk about it in Friendster Bulletin previously; Boy, was I upset!), I had written an email to a senior (already graduated) who co-authored this work to inform him that this same paper was rejected the 3rd time!

I was more frustrated than depressed when I sent my senior that e-mail to inform him that it was REJECTED again!!!

Anyway, the next day, I received an e-mail from him titled "Please cheer up" and it’s content touched me right to the core.

The email was as follows:

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Dear Doris,

A paper is only a paper. A good thesis is much more important. It can help you to make a smooth oral defence. You have done your best on the manuscript. There is no regret. Please put all your time on your thesis.
I had never seen a girl who can walk so long before you did it. I had never knew a beautiful girl who can achieve high scores on her module and made much effort in her research project before I met you. You are really a beautiful, industrious and optimistic girl. We all love you and support you from our deep heart. Please cheer up and feel the happiness of your progress. We are looking forward to your success on your study and research!

All the best wishes to you!

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Why? I never know I have made a difference! I never know I have created such an impression in him from the little things I’ve done!

I recall Dec 2005 when we suddenly decided to walk back from Bukit Timah (Beauty World) all the way back to Eunos where he took an MRT to Pasir Ris while I continue to walk home. Took me a whole 5 hours and left me with 2 sore feet! But this feat was so long ago and I was surprised it created such an impression in him. Maybe, he was totally taken aback by my endurance and spirit back then. He might have expected me to say, "Let’s just take a cab back."

And I never knew my commitment in my modules and staying up late in the lab to do my research experiments had made him see me different from others.

His email reminded me that our actions, no matter how small, sometimes does make a big difference to others when we do not think too much about it.

And of course, it really WARMS my heart to have people who still believe in me when I’m down. ^^

I was having a game of tennis with a friend on Sunday’s evening when two things dawn on me.

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I realized many times, I refused to run for the ball and wait for the 2nd bounce (which is not allowed in tennis) before hitting the ball back. Alright, I was lazy… hehe… but then I realize:-

Lesson #1 learnt: "Many times, life do not offer a 2nd chance… and if you do not do your best for the first time, they might be no more 2nd chance."

Well, in my case, it’s only a friendly game of tennis, but even that, sometimes, when I miss the first bounce, it doesn’t mean I will get the ball on the second bounce. =p

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The next thing that I’ve observed is that sometimes the ball got really low and it seems impossible for me to hit it back to the other court, when somehow the ball manage to get over and it triggers another few rallies.

Lesson #2 learnt: "Some situations may present itself as a failed case, yet only when we go forward and embrace it will we be able to determine whether it’s a success or a failure. Surprisingly, many times it’s a success, if we have attempted."

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Well, that was a game of tennis out of so many other games that made me took back 2 lessons + some muscle aches… hehe..

Haha, I have finally decided to start a blog at friendster instead of posting randomly at the friendster bulletin! So you know you can choose to read or not to read about it… hoho… and it don’t serve as a sore thumb (for some =p) sticking up at one corner of your friendster.

With the start of the piggy year, I have decided to start a new commitment to write about some lessons I’ve learnt from personal experiences and hopefully, it means something to you.

Life is full of ups and downs and while I’m still experiencing some downside of it, I thought it serves as an alarm clock to have me start rethinking about my life, myself, my choices, my purposes, my personalities etc.. once again.